After a breakup, you might be tempted to text to get your ex back. Some experts advise against this, while others have devoted entire courses to teaching you how to text to open up your ex to the idea of ​​getting back together.

So why is there such a discrepancy?

Texting to get your ex back is a fairly new idea. Much relationship advice has been around for hundreds or even thousands of years. But cell phones and text messages are relatively new technologies. Therefore, advice on how to use them properly to get your ex back has been slow to develop.

The truth is, you CAN get your ex back using carefully crafted text messages. However, it’s also true that you can drive your ex away forever if you send the wrong types of texts or send them too often.

Using text messages to get your ex back needs to be done in a systematic way that involves several different phases.

First, you need to cut off all contact with your ex for about a month. This means no texting, no calling, no hanging out, etc. You have to give your ex time to miss you and time to work out how they currently feel about you.

Next, you need to gently open the lines of communication. This is where you use texts that are commonly known as “through the arc” or “shot in the dark” texts.

The idea is simply to let your ex know that you’re thinking about him and that you’re okay with the breakup. You don’t pressure them to respond, but you want them to start thinking positive thoughts about you.

For example: “I couldn’t help but think of you last night during that incredible thunderstorm. I know how much you love walking in the rain. I hope you’re doing great.”

Next, you want to use various types of text messages that plant positive thoughts and emotions in your ex’s mind and remind him of how close the two of you used to be. These are commonly known as “relationship best” and “intimacy booster” texts.

For example: “Do you remember the first time you took me snowboarding and I spent the whole time crashing down the hill on my butt? I remember how you smiled at me every time you helped me up. That was so much fun… even if I couldn’t sit down later.”

Once you’ve established a connection again, there are also texts to get your ex back that involve using your ex’s jealousy to your advantage and others that allow you to risk your heart and tell your ex how you really feel.

It is important to note that you must use these types of texts in the correct way and in the correct order. After all, reminding your ex how close she is or telling her deepest feelings right after a breakup is probably not a good strategy when using text to get your ex back.